Reunited with Bikram

Today is a Philippine holiday, the end of Ramadan. Eid Mubarak, my Muslim friends.

This also translates to sleeping in with El Paco, having unrushed and home-made breakfast, quality time with my love (we’re buying his school shoes today) and about an hour of quiet blogging time for mommy. Yay! I love non-working holidays!

I made some open-faced sandwiches from pan de sal halves,
cream cheese, tomatoes, dried basil, chopped prunes and
truffle oil (instead of butter)

the usual morning fruit bowl: pineapple, papaya, mango and banana
Oh and no coffee today just tea -- wee! :)

I was planning to go to yoga class this morning but I was too sore. Like really achey sore. The good kind, I think I’d actually benefit from going to class today, there’s one at noon but I’ll play it by ear…more like, let’s see if Paco will let me leave the house without him. Going back, I went to my first bikram class last Sunday… my first in 5 years. Funny but the profound realization of the need to go back after 6 years was brought about by my selfie post. Lol! This sarcastic journal of mine is really changing my life – for the better! THANK YOU BLOGGING! I recall how differently I felt about myself, others and life in general when I was doing yoga. I was sharp, focused and had a more serene outlook -- a gentle quiet one. I let the small stuff slide, which enabled me to channel my energy to deal with the bigger issues. I was more centered and I felt wonderful. So last Sunday, I called the nearest bikram yoga studio to get their schedule of classes. I packed my yoga mat, towels (you need 2), toiletries, change of clothes and my water bottle. Just when my heart was set to go, I get the first-timer jitters. I'm not flexible. Will I be able to stand the heat for 90 minutes? What if I pass out? Throw up? Did I consume any pork this week? Hope it doesn't smell in class. Oh no...the smell!

I sent my Vancouver BFF a WhatsApp message for a prayer request… “I will do hot yoga today after eons. Please pray that I don’t pass out. J” 

She replied half an hour later… “Will pray for u. Don’t force urself w hot yoga ha. Follow what ur body tells u. If its too much even going for half an hour is something. Ease into it. (thumbs up icon)” We chatted for a bit after that and I felt better. I know she prayed for me. I’ll be alright.

I arrived the studio 45 minutes early. I’m obviously anxious. I went to the locker room to change into my yoga outfit (sports bra and boy leg shorts) and I cringed at how my reflection has changed. Same yoga outfit, same person, different tummy. I used to like the way I looked in rib-baring outfits. Brushing my self-deprecating thoughts away, I moved away from the mirror and walked out of the locker room. I’m doing this – ugly belly or not. I went to the heated room to reserve a spot and placed my mat and towel. There were 4 people in the room already. Wow! Early. Really early yoginis. One of them noticed the lost look on my face and asked if I was a first timer. I said yes – a bit unsure. It IS technically my first time in 6 years. He showed me a good spot – under the fan and away from the heat vent. I said my thanks and began unrolling my mat and towel. This was really nerve wracking. After what felt like hours of staring in the mirror, stretching and trying (and failing) to relax, the receptionist called me out of the heated room for an orientation with the teacher. Apparently, there was another first-timer. Yay! When the teacher saw me, she asked, “Is it your first time? You never tried this before?” I said I had back in 2008. She smiled and waved her hand dismissingly at me, like she was shooing me away. “Oh you’re not a first-timer. No need for an orientation. It’s okay.” I must’ve looked scared or confused or both because she followed with, “Don’t worry, it will all come back to you in the room. Trust me. It’s okay.” I walked back to the hot room desperately trying to recall how my orientation went 6 years ago. 

Sit down or lie down when you feel dizzy.

That’s all I remember. That should work.

I sat on my mat as the room started to fill with other students. Some were doing headstands and some really difficult stretches and poses. I was intimidated. The new girl who just finished orientation walked in and sat next to me. Yay! I started to ask her about the orientation. “What did she tell you? Just sit when you feel dizzy? Can we drink water between poses?” She hurriedly nodded yes (I guess that applies to all my questions) as the teacher walked into the classroom and alerted the class to the start of practice.

Ninety hot minutes of painful muscle stretching, twists, back bends, forward bends and deep breathing exercises, I walked out of the heated room literally dripping wet. I had to wince and shut my eyes a couple of times during practice as the sweat was beginning to drip into my eyes and I got some into my nose twice or thrice during some forward bends – yup, that kind of dripping wet sweat. My towel was wet (not damp...wet), my mat was in need of an alcohol wipe down, my top and shorts needed some serious wringing and I needed a shower. I felt amazing. Everything came back to me. This is why I love yoga. Ninety minutes of focus – on your body, mind and soul. The savasana (dead man’s pose) was my favorite. This is the pose where you let everything go. You lie on your back (sometimes on your belly) and you focus on one spot and you just don’t move. You stop thinking. You just let go. And that’s what I did. I let it go. I let go of the day’s events, my to do list, my targets, my anxiety, all the hurt, all my fears, all my wants, my plans, everything – out into the tiny, slightly burnt hole (which I later learned was actually a heat vent) in the ceiling. My back hurts, my sides, my hamstrings, my legs, my arms, geez even my chin hurts (I AM NOT KIDDING! MY CHIN REALLY HURTS)! But I feel wonderful. My spine feels a lot straighter, seriously after just 2 sessions I noticed that I brushed my teeth with a straighter back – hahaha!

So there, after blogging about this I guess I’m going to the 12:30pm class today and I’m actually pretty excited.

Oh and that night, my bestfriend from Canada sent me some amazing photos of her hike with the hubby that day. She’s said this view was just 20 minutes away from where she lived. The thought of driving out for just 20 minutes and seeing this great view of the mountains and an ocean is beyond happiness. Oh well. Someday, Ysa. 

BFF Ysa -- such a tease! :)
Okay, okay, your photos are awesome!

20 minutes away from where she lives...Dang!!!

She just had to send me this photo too...just to rub it in.
Ugh.

To repay her for the breathtaking photos, I sent her my I-survived-yoga sweaty locker room shot. Lol!

I survived and will be back for more...

Then it struck me -- the studio is 20-minutes away from where I lived and the view of that tiny hole in the ceiling gave me the same feeling of peace and serenity as Ysa’s mountain and ocean view. Hah! It’s a TIE! The hole works for me – for now at least. Yes, yoga will do… for now but Ysa owes me and P a hike in 2016.

The GOAL but for now I must learn to LOCK MY KNEES! :)